The Xochitl Sodality Wonders & Marvels Committee, Cedar Rapids Chapter
SOBS glossary

Grikdog's Blog
g r i k d o g @ p o b o x . c o m

Sun, 15 Oct 2006 15:10:46 CDTFYI

The Blog Has Moved!
My blog will hang around at this address for the foreseeable, but the actual live daily gorgonzola is now at this address:

http://grikdog.blogspot.com/


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Mon, 9 Oct 2006 08:49:51 CDTBlog

Atomic science experiment
North Korea apparently conducted an atomic science experiment last night — and we can probably all relax as the fallout fails to knock even one Cialis ad off the evening news.

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Sun, 8 Oct 2006 11:21:57 CDTUkulele

What the left hand is doing, contd. (Epona's Song)
This is sort of curious. It's only 16 measures of demo output, and I'm not sure the ocarina-like MIDI translates well to ukelele. Not that I would know... ;-)
Epona's Song, from MIDI, by TablEdit Carbon Demo v2.64 (Ukulele, GCEA)


 |       |       |       |        |       |       |       |        
|5---2---0---------------5---2---|0---------------5---2---0-------|
|--------------------------------|--------------------------------|
|--------------------------------|--------------------------------|
|7-----------------------7-------|----------------7---------------|
 
 |       |       |       |        |       |       |       |        
|2-------0-----------------------|------------------------4---5---|
|--------------------------------|2-------1-------2---------------|
|--------------------------------|6-------------------------------|
|--------2-----------------------|------------------------6-------|
 
 |       |       |       |        |       |       |       |        
|2---------------5---------------|5-------4---2---0---------------|
|--------------------------------|--------------------------------|
|--------------------------------|--------------------------------|
|----------------7---------------|12------11--9---7---------------|
 
 |       |       |       |        |       |       |       |        
|5---2---0-------0-------5---2---|0-------5-------5---2---0---5---|
|--------------------------------|--------------------------------|
|--------------------------------|--------------------------------|
|2-------2---------------2---4---|7---------------7-------7-------|
 
 |       |       |       |        |       |       |       |        
|2-------0-----------------------|------------------------4---5---|
|--------------------------------|2-------1-------2---------------|
|--------------------------------|6-------------------------------|
|4-------5-----------------------|------------------------6-------|
 
 |       |       |       |        |       |       |       |        
|2---------------5---------------|7-------5-------12------10------|
|--------------------------------|--------------------------------|
|--------------------------------|--------------------------------|
|--------------------------------|17------16----------------------|
 
 |       |       |       |        |       |       |       |        
|5---2---0---------------5---2---|0---------------5---2---0-------|
|--------------------------------|--------------------------------|
|--------------------------------|--------------------------------|
|7-----------------------7-------|----------------7---------------|
 
 |       |       |       |        |       |       |       |        
|2-------0-----------------------|------------------------4---5---|
|--------------------------------|2-------1-------2---------------|
|--------------------------------|6-------------------------------|
|--------2-----------------------|------------------------6-------|
 

Created with TablEdit for Mac - http://www.tabledit.com/
        

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Sat, 7 Oct 2006 23:46:18 CDTUkulele

What the left hand is doing (on a ukulele)
Here are the notes on each string of a standard soprano ukelele. The open top string, concert A, is 440 Hz. Similar notes in bold type are equal pitch; e.g., the second fret on the G string is the same A as the open top string.

        1     2     3     4  •  5     6  •  7     8     9  • 10    11    12    13    14    15
A || Bb |  B  |  C  |  C# |  D  |  D# |  E  |  F  |  F# |  G  |  G# |  A  |  Bb |  B  |  C  |
E || F  |  F# |  G  |  G# |  A  |  Bb |  B  |  C  |  C# |  D  |  D# |  E  |  F  |  F# |  G  |
C || C# |  D  |  D# |  E  |  F  |  F# |  G  |  G# |  A  |  Bb |  B  |  C  |  C# |  D  |  D# |
G || G# |  A  |  Bb |  B  |  C  |  C# |  D  |  D# |  E  |  F  |  F# |  G  |  G# |  A  |  Bb |
        1     2     3     4  •  5     6  •  7     8     9  • 10    11    12    13    14    15
        
So, tablature for the theme from Lon Lon Ranch/Epona's Song (midi) by Koji Kondo, from Ocarina of Time, MIGHT be suggested by this doubtful arrangement
A: --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
E: --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
C: --------------------------------------------------(hmmmm.... that's not it)-----------------------------------------
G: --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    F D C F D C F D C D C  B BbB E C#F F E D C F D C F D C F D C D C B BbB E F#E C C C C C D C BbA C G A A A A A B C B
        
Tabs suggest the duration of notes not at all, so picking this in equal measure produces no discernible tune.

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Thu, 5 Oct 2006 00:25:17 CDTUkulele

Bushman Jenny Soprano
I can't quite figure out the Bushman Jenny story. Mine is marked "original" Bushman BU7S-HG, meaning high gloss Jenny Soprano. Until recently, the price on these was about $225 or so, but mine was $169 at Stars Guitars, with a gigbag and a couple picks. This uke is very slightly shopworn, with mother-of-toilet-seat fretboard dots, mahogany and rosewood with colored fake abalone purfling. The sound is loud and vocal, with some strange overtones now and then. I'll probably never learn to play it, but it's fun trying. My second uke, the first was a hand-me-down joke from the 1940's.

In the last 60 years, I've owned a uke. Recorder. Two and half fairly good guitars. A couple of cheap bongo sets. A dulcimer. Cheap school trumpet. And another ukulele, this one worth the money.
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Tue, 3 Oct 2006 23:17:48 CDTZelda

Gerudo Valley theme on the guitar (YouTube)

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Mon, 2 Oct 2006 23:02:33 CDTTop 40 Country Countdowns Dept.

Squib
I pulled myself out of a comma (sic) this evening, and realized I'd been watching the Letterman show for, say, five, ten minutes. Heck, when it comes to comedy, timing is everything. Tomorrow, I buy a ukelele.

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Sun, 1 Oct 2006 11:20:04 CDTFive years late and a $100 billion short Dept.

Froggie courtin' allies...
"Whoever is not against us is for us."
     — Jesus H. Christ [see Mark 9:40]

"You're either with us or against us!"
     — George W. Bush, November 6, 2001

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Sat, 30 Sep 2006 12:25:12 CDTNetwork? What network? Dept.

Who pulled the plug on my ISP...??
Com-Link, one of our local yokel Cedar Rapids ISPs, found themselves in some kind of dispute with either Verizon or MCI (depending who you talk to, and when), so MY blog, alleged "1.5 Mbps" (ha!) DSL line and connection to the world disappeared overnight last Tuesday or Wednesday. Things are approximately back to normal, with some glaring omissions (such as Usenet), but nowhere near the 1.5 Mbps I pay $28.00 a month to Qwest for.

What? Yes, I pay Qwest for my DSL line, and Com-Link is my ISP. When Com-Link has trouble with "one of their upstream providers", Com-Link gets disconnected by someone who isn't Qwest. What am I paying for? Time to think about ISPs again?

[UPDATE: Com-Link tells me what I rent from Qwest is copper, the physical wire in the ground. Everything else is the stuff doing the actual work. Nice racket, huh? Community broadband, anyone?]
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Wed, 27 Sep 2006 20:28:29 CDTTeeVee

Dead Like Me
Sci Fi Channel's Dead Like Me is the best show on TV since Northern Exposure. Offbeat? Witty? Funny? Self-aware? Gently self-deprecating? Uses the word "fart" in a plain English sentence? Angry? Perplexed? Juvenile? Well written? Wizeguy wizzdum? Amiable, hip, diverting ensemble cast? Hoo chunks! Geddoverit! George, the cute girl, gets hit in the head by a toilet seat from outer space, and the rest as they say is J. Nessy Kwa.

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Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:20:33 CDTBlog

The Rubaiyat of Benedict XVI
The Pope says Islam is violent and Mohammed added nothing good... to what? The Inquisition? Giordano Bruno's bonfire? Joan of Arc's? The concept of "Seal of the Prophets" was a pretty useful addition, in my humble opinion. It throws responsibility for human behavior squarely onto human shoulders, saying God is now a completely revealed open book (therefore, no more excuses!) Christian theologians could take a look at that one.

You could ask yourself what Islam wants you to submit to. Submitting to the rigors of 14th century logic is probably not it, although, in that regard, it's worth noting that Omar Khayyam, the Persian poet and mathematician, broached issues in non-Euclidian geometry a full eight centuries before Bernhard Riemann.‡

So... The Pope says something stupid. And some Islamofascist in Mogadishu pops a cap in a nun to get even? Sorry, guys. A plague on both your houses. I think Mohammed has the right of it — a clear light in a quiet niche.
 Omar Khayyam's tomb in Naishapur, Iran

‡Omar was also beset by Mullahs in his old age, and forced to make a pilgrimage to Mecca to prove he was a "good Muslim." Khayyam, the astronomer and mathematician who reformed the Persian calendar a thousand years ago, would have been interested in a development just this week that allows most U.S. Muslims to begin (and end) their fasting month of Ramadan according to astronomical calculations, instead of pegging it to naked eye observation of the new crescent moon. On cloudy nights, the moon is not visible, and by tradition Ramadan is therefore postponed until the sighting is made. According to NPR this afternoon, that used to mess up a lot of daily life since nobody could know in advance when Ramadan was really going to to begin. Not anymore. I dunno, direct observation of the crescent moon sounds poetic to me. How's about, we keep that, and instead radical Islamists apologize to Omar?

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Sun, 17 Sep 2006 12:08:02 CDTDon't Blip Dat Tar Baby Again, George Dept.

WTF?
George Soros has a point. The problem with the "War on Terror" is that it's not a policy, it's a good old American mindf**k, as we used to call it in the Vietnam era. "War on Terror" would be George Bush's license to kill, if it was actually winning any wars.

The absurd truth seems to be, there is no actual, winning "war" part of the "war on terror." If there was, Osama bin Laden would be dead, we'd have nuked the Hindu Kush in the second month of the fuss in Afghanistan, we'd be defoliating the Taliban poppy crop, and we wouldn't be pretending "you don't have to be like Saddam Hussein" in order to keep order in Iraq, when clearly you do, and clearly we've been doing it — to the point that the Baathist Party now supports American involvement in Iraq.

George W. Bush, what a doofus. Was there ever a moment when anyone on Bush's staff knew that Saddam Hussein was a socialist, and that Al Qaeda hated his guts? I'm the same age as W, so I know he read Little Golden Books, especially the Uncle Remus stories about Br'er Fox and Br'er Rabbit. Especially, since we be talkin' Texicans here, the story of the Wonderful Tar Baby. Attention deficit disorder as a kid?

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Fri, 15 Sep 2006 07:21:51 CDTLondon Blitz? What London Blitz? Dept.

Explosive Reading
I see J. K. Rowling almost got kicked off a plane because she refused to part with her handwritten manuscript (parts of it irreplaceable) for the last and final Harry Potter book. Sheesh. If it wasn't explosive before, it sure will be now.

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Thu, 14 Sep 2006 11:41:11 CDTJam Tomorrow Dept.

Gas Prices
Gas prices went down just about Labor Day, right? Coincidentally, that's the day Americans start paying attention to election campaigns. It's true, political campaigns have been hard at work for months or even years already, mostly bulding organizations and doing a lot of fundraising — but until Labor Day rolls around, voters aren't paying attention to the November elections. Nothing directed at teflon-headed voters before Labor Day can stick.

So...! Gas prices went down on Labor Day. Guess what's going UP the day AFTER Election Day? Gas prices?!? Ohhhh, very good. Give that rube a ceegar.

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Mon, 11 Sep 2006 22:57:52 CDTWiesyGram

Laughing all the way to the prom
As I recall, Michelle Wie never begged nobody for that $10 million bucks. I just hope to Weehauken she hasn't sunk the whole wad in hot Taiwanese real estate, or she might actually have to qualify for the LPGA — when she's old enough. You rock, kid.

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Mon, 4 Sep 2006 11:04:38 CDTBoots On Dept.

Crikey...
Steve Irwin (1962-2006)

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Sun, 3 Sep 2006 12:01:38 CDTIF but only IF

Why Galatea sucks
The pseudonymous Emily Short seems pretty high hat for a bright girl hacker, but My Dinner with Andre her game is not. Every man knows the feeling that he's just had a conversation with a puzzle box, that he can't play a game with no known rules, that he can't win. Galatea is worse. Galatea's cheat sheet is right here. No real woman would ever give you the inch.

[The nereid Galatea has also lent her name to several famous boats and ships.]

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Sat, 2 Sep 2006 10:01:48 CDTSleep well, America

Good Guys and Bad Guys Who Have the Bomb



Good Guys
  • The good ol' U. S. of A.!
  • Merry Olde England
  • Those Frenchies
  • Are Russkies good guys these days?
  • The technocrats of modern India
  • Our friends, the Pakistanis
  • The sane and sober ANCIENT CIVILIZATION of China
  • The Israelis ("We all live in a yellow submarine...")

Bad Guys
  • Those crazy loons in North Korea
  • Those Islamo-fascists in Tehran, if not now then soon
  • Republicans

Actually, the nuclear map is fun to figure out. In World War II, the U.S., the Germans and the Japanese were all working on nuclear weapons. The Germans lost that race, but the United States and Japan both developed a working nuclear bomb in 1945. Hirohito surrendered before the Japanese could deploy their weapon, and that was that. Except...

Joseph Stalin, a convinced dialectical materialist ideologue, realized that Russia had to have the bomb to keep Western capitalist imperialists from destabilizing the Russian Revolution, as they had tried to do twenty years earlier. Russia, he felt, absolutely must create a balance of terror with "the West", a term synonymous with the United States and its running dog lackeys, Japan, England and France — curiously enough, in that order. Russia and Japan had old issues dating back to Czarist sponsorship of the Trans-Siberian Railway.

The lessons of Mutually Assured Destruction were lost on no one, of course. Under the shelter of Marxist ideology, China developed its own weapon, thereby procuring independence from resurgent militarism in Japan. Mao, you must recall, was also fighting the previous war!

I'm not sure of the timeline, but France and England also developed their own bombs in the Fifties and Sixties. These are the most quixotic members of the nuclear club to date (with one exception), since no possible advantage accrues to nations so small that a nuclear exchange would have border-to-border implications. India developed her bomb on the Soviet model. Pakistan developed its bomb in reaction to the prospect of Indian reconquest and de-partition by force. There was even a brief clash between nuclear powers on the border between India and China, until the real interests of both powers clarified themselves.

The exception, of course, is Israel, which never developed its own weapon. On the contrary, the United States gave Golda Maier her nuclear club membership — probably during John F. Kennedy's presidency, since Eisenhower (who understood the military-industrial complex!) would never have uncorked the nuclear genie. And it couldn't have been Lyndon B. Johnson, since Moshe Dayan clearly had the bomb during the Six Days War when he strafed the U. S. S. Liberty, an act Johnson forgave but clearly never forgot. JFK's motive for building up Israel's atomic technology was obviously to contain Communism. At this time, both Egypt and India were friendly with the Soviet Union. Kennedy probably felt a compelling need to have friendly nukes in Israel — at this time, unquestionably the United States' strategic ally.

After the implosion of the Soviet Union, the world has changed. Older grievances than the strangely riveting Cold War have reasserted themselves. In other words, the Middle East that Cold Warriors like Condaleezza Rice and Paul Wolfovitz trained themselves for decades to see one particularly useful way no longer exists. From the point of view of U.S. realpolitik there is no discernible reason for Kennedy's Israel to exist, except old times' sake and sentiment.

In other words, Japan and Israel have for decades occupied Battlestar Galactica roles in U.S. foreign policy, which places them high up on any non-inclusive list of triggers for Armageddon. Two obvious scenarios:

  • Japan steps out from under the U.S. nuclear umbrella and reveals a nuclear device which surprises absolutely no one. Japan has had nuclear technology and ICBM-capable rocketry for decades. North Korea will be irrelevant in this exchange, since Japan will be taken out by China and Russia, triggering World War III.

  • A pre-emptive strike by the Israelis on military targets in Iran will not immediately trigger Armageddon, since, frankly, no one greatly cares about Iran, apart from oil. What would cause this to be a nuclear flash point is the resurgence of the old Soviet Union. In this case, Israel would once again occupy a strategic role in U.S. military thinking — implying an imminent strike by the United States against targets in the Ukraine and Russia.

Obviously, reduced to irrelevance in real analysis, both Israel and Japan must wag the dog of American foreign policy as best they can. But the key phrase is reduced to irrelevance. An ancient player has re-emerged — the Islamic World Caliphate.

The current intolerable status quo, with the United States blipped into the Iraqi tarbaby for the next decade, plays murkily into the hands of China. The squalid war in Iraq ironically underlines Saddam Hussein's tactics — implying that we can't win without becoming like Saddam, which the American people will not tolerate, so long as we are free to vote.

At the same time, U.S. failure undermines Bush's so-called "Coalition of the WIlling," who become less eager to coalesce and more eager to discover opportunities to put their own stamp on events in the Middle East. Tony Blair's subservient England finds its role in the Middle East reduced from mandate to U.S. manacle-minder, with baffling repercussions on its own turf.

With the entire panoply of players left over from the Cold War stultified and stalemated in the Middle East, only China stands to gain from the looming clash of civilizations. As the West abrades both itself and the Islamic World Caliphate from the Caucasus to Southeast Asia, China is free to repress its own Islamic minority just like everyone else, adopt a mein of benign but impotent concern, and inherit the world.

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Wed, 30 Aug 2006 23:09:46 CDTInteractive Friction

Harry and Trudy and Sam
"Don't mind Harry," said Sam. "He's harmless."

"What are you cussing about, Harry?" asked Trudy. "Yeah, I can tell," she said, directing the sass at Sam.

"It's this consarned laptop," Harry rejoined. "You know, I really don't mind it when the feds put their consarned spyware on my laptop."

Sam winked at Trudy. Trudy said, "Then why are you cussing, Harry?"

"For the kind of taxes I pay, you'd think they could debug their stuff. I get tired of it, you know. Consarned buggy spyware."

"Why do you think the feds have put spyware on your laptop, Harry?"

"'Cause I know they can't read my mind otherwise, what did you say her name was, Sam?"

"Trudy," said Sam.

"Trudy. See?" Harry tipped his porkpie. It was lined with aluminum foil.

"Say, Harry," said Trudy. "Was you ever bit by a dead bee?"



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Sun, 27 Aug 2006 11:50:59 CDTQuixotica

Inform 7
This is about the coolest and most desuetudinous program I've ever seen, because it is an IDE (!) for Inform, a system of compilers, libraries and philosophies intended to help programmers write Text Adventure Games — on the old, extremely portable Infocom Z-Code model — which nobody ever plays these days. Phenomenally beautiful program, phenomenally ephemeral utility ... but an idea which will not or can not die. I'll have to look into this...

Curiously, even though the Mac OS X version is written for Tiger (10.4.x), it seems to run just fine (at first blush, anyway) on Panther (10.3.9).

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Sat, 26 Aug 2006 00:14:17 CDTWiesyGram

Michelle Wie's new caddy...
... according to Golf Week, is Andrew Lano II, who Googles blank except for a couple of old and inaccessible (probably unrelated?) Aussie windsurfing photos. Interesting choice, groks right.

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Thu, 24 Aug 2006 06:57:04 CDTGeorge Bernard Pshaw

Maid to order
Speaking of Pygmalion, Harrison & Hepburn, I understand him. It's her I don't get. Why the devil did she go back?


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Tue, 22 Aug 2006 08:12:43 CDTI'm Too Dumb For This One Dept.

Holy Fans of Phlogiston, Batman!
Chandra X-Ray Observatory view of the Bullet Cluster in Carina

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Mon, 21 Aug 2006 07:20:44 CDTSticky Notes

It's an off-year election, Newt!
It just feels like World War Three.

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Sat, 19 Aug 2006 13:44:48 CDTDept. R

Pirate party...??

What about that Israeli commando raid inside Lebanon yesterday? Ceasefire, what ceasefire? Doh! Like Hezbollah (and every bookie outside Tel Aviv) couldn't see that one coming? Maybe Mohammed is the Seal of the Prophets because the mistakes being made these days are ... well ... [insert Eisnerville caesura] ... obvious? So... If History repeats herself, who in the Middle East is Sparta, who the Helots?

Did you know Spartan women could jump and kick themselves in the ass with their own two heels, simultaneously? Apparently, so can the Israelis. A strangely formidable sight, especially if, like me, you can imagine the spirit of Golda Meier wearing a Life With Mama dark blue dress with white polkadots and flailing away like knees don't matter, urging her menfolk laconically on to greater and deadlier ferocity. Against the eerie, backbeat ululation of a quarter billion† Arab women, the subsonic thunder of twenty million‡ self-motivated yentas hammering their fundaments (and then the earth) with pitiless calcanii. Scary, scary stuff. Downright apocalyptic. Oy, such a vision!

†Astutely observed! Yes, this is a made-up fact.
‡Another made-up fact. The ratio between these two numbers is approximately the same as Injuns to Troopas at the Little Big Horn.

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Thu, 17 Aug 2006 00:25:09 CDTInnocent, We Presume?

Old Photos
Of all the photos of JonBenet Ramsey out there, isn't there ONE that shows her as a normal child?
Goldie Hawn, of course

Oh, hell. After years of looking for ANOTHER SUSPECT because the Ramseys hired a good lawyer so we can't BLAME THE PARENTS because we can't BLAME THE VICTIM (who's only six), let's just get on with crucifying the SCHOOL TEACHER by comparing his mug shot to a decade of PSYCHIC SKETCHES! (Spare us this guy's CONFESSIONAL VOYEURISM, though. Seriously.) AAAaaaaaaaagh! This case was MADE for Zippy the Pinhead!

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Tue, 15 Aug 2006 12:38:53 CDTBlog

After Lebanon, Logorrhea
Ok, Sherman said war is hell. That's not the same as a license to kill, now, is it? Nope, war is about laying down the law where there is no law (or none we like), a passage through anarchy towards order. I'm skeptical of claims about "rules of engagement" or "the law of war". Foo. None such exists.

When law fails, when Right makes Might, then war is about whose side had fewer self-inflicted delusions — and even then, war involves a horrible throw of the dice, doesn't it? It's right to ridicule delusion. When delusion starts swinging chains and cocking zip guns, ridicule might even be a moral imperative.

You don't decide blame or guilt in a court of law, once the fighting stops. That is hypocrisy of a high, high order. No. Law is poured golden from the crucibles of Hell. War is ridicule by other means. The winners hang the losers on the nearest convenient gallows, if they dare, while widows and orphans pile rocks on everybody's dead. Fight! urges the Bhagavad Gita. It does not promise victory.

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Mon, 14 Aug 2006 18:16:44 CDTWiesyGram

A modest proposal
Michelle Wie is taking a lot of unnecessary grief for axing her former caddie, Whatsisname. What about tapping John Daly for a weekend or two? Wie's schedule right now is fairly light, and it's just the kind of phony celebrity story William Morris Agency would love. Wie likes Daly, he has gravitas she'd listen to, and they could agree to donate any winnings to HIS charity.

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Sun, 13 Aug 2006 10:53:32 CDTElegy, Green

Requiescat in Pace

It's difficult to imagine the grandeur of these huge enclosed spaces... I once stood transfixed for three or four long seconds as a clumsy squirrel belly flopped through eighty feet of empty air to the pavement below. He slapped the deck hard, and after a moment or two of obviously stinging pain, waddled gingerly away.

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Sat, 12 Aug 2006 14:12:09 CDTHey, Mr. Tallyman!

What?! No more bananas?!
If you think the tough necked, hard to peel bananas you buy in stores these days are nothing like the bananas you ate as a kid, you're absolutely right. It turns out the ubiquitous banana is doomed to extinction in 10 years or less by Panama disease, a tropical fungus plague. The only hope to "Save the Banana" is to hybridize it with a coarser, hardier banana relative, the plantain. Plantains are bigger, starchier, tougher and shaped like Viking boats.

The few perfect yellow Cavendish bananas in grocery stores these days, it seems, were bred to replace an earlier (and far better) banana variety, the Gros Michel (which Chiquita calls the "Big Mike" for us dumb Americans), which rotted out of commerce back in the days of Lucille Ball and Desi Arnez. What a pity! What a crying shame! Losing all the American Elm trees that turned the city streets of my kidhood into green cathedrals was bad enough. But bananas, too?

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Sat, 12 Aug 2006 01:00:00 CDTCode Shampoo

Alert Alert
This thing in London at Heathrow reeks of amateur hour and overreaction, if not a plot by Karl Rove to churn an investigation ongoing in Britain since last July up to hysteria levels. I think Lieberman's loss last Tuesday must have shocked the Neocons into looking busy.

Bush's strategy is the same as Napoleon's — to avoid the inevitable reckoning by waging ever wider war as long as possible. Bush's 1812 probably comes in 2012, when John McCain, the last Republican President in American history, fails to win re-election and the whole Neocon kit and caboodle gets frogmarched off to Nuremberg.



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Thu, 10 Aug 2006 15:59:20 CDTBlog

Lieberman, Loser
Remember Scoop Jackson, the Senator from Boeing? He lost various Democratic Presidential primaries in 1976, the year Jimmy Carter won, for exactly the same reason Lieberman, the Senator from Israel, lost last Tuesday. Curiously, the inheritors of Jackson's Soviet and Middle East policies appear to be the Bush Neocons ... and Lieberman. Jackson's not nearly so popular with us "radical left" Democrats, then or now. Lieberman will be just as unelectable as Scoop, if he soldiers on. Frankly, I credit his flavor-of-the-month unpalatability with Reagan Democrats for Al Gore's loss in 2000. It's not anti-Semitism, or even anti-Zionism. It's aversion to Armageddon.


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Thu, 10 Aug 2006 15:33:35 CDTWiesyGram

Fanny Sunesson, where are you?
I see Michelle Wie finally dropped her caddie, Greg Johnston. Hard to see that one coming, right? Frankly, I thought he'd done himself in when Wie got DQ'd for that imperceptibly improper drop at the Samsung World Championship last October. Johnston's mistake may have been thinking a 16 year old Hawaiian Wunderkind needs the Deuce Bigalow act he used to put on for Julie Inkster.



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Tue, 8 Aug 2006 10:13:41 CDTBlog

Text Wrangler
I've been a fan of BBEdit for years, but it's gotten long in the tooth. Fortunately, the authors have released Text Wrangler, which shares enough of the old BBEdit interface to seem familiar but it's improved overall.
  1. It's free as in beer
  2. Now uses the standard Mac OS X font dialogs
  3. Loads, edits and saves files on an FTP server
  4. Easily switches text encodings, e.g., to Shift-JIS (Japanese)
  5. Recent files menu may include FTP server files
  6. Folder comparison seems to work (this was broken in BBEdit 6.1.3)
  7. You can invoke Text Wrangler from the Unix command line to edit or compare files (edit and twdiff)
  8. Come-on features (to get you to buy the full BBEdit 8) can be disabled and mostly hidden from view
  9. Old familiar BBEdit features like text wrap, show gremlins, file comparison, etc., are right where you expect them
  10. A programmer's editor, just like BBEdit Lite


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Mon, 7 Aug 2006 16:12:40 CDTDept. of Messy Questions

Who was Mohammad Amin al-Husayni?
Just before Ari ben Canaan (Paul Newman) realizes that some of his best friends were Arabs in the seldom-resurrected Oscar winner† Exodus (1960), we see a preposterous episode straight out of Hogan's Heroes in which a former Waffen SS Kommandant indicates that now (in 1948) he works for Mohammad Amin al-Husayni, the Grand Mufti of Jerusalem, instead of Adolf Hitler, der defunkter Fuhrer.

To its credit, the movie does quote the Mufti's reaction to the U.N. vote to partition Palestine into "the state of Israel and a separate but equal Arab state" (in 1960, the Civil Rights movement was just getting under weigh, so quizzical reaction to that ironic turn of phrase is entirely anachronistic) — to wit, that a bunch of gentlemen in Flushing Meadows (i.e., the members of the United Nations) have no right to divide up his country.

†Best score
The image right is another item that Wikipedia's diligent content wranglers have found unsuitable for inclusion.


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Sat, 5 Aug 2006 08:36:36 CDTWhat's Up, Doc? Dept.

Favorite scenes in favorite movies
The tough guy standing in the rain at the sign of the Prancing Pony in Bree, eating a carrot, is Peter Jackson.

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Fri, 4 Aug 2006 17:07:54 CDTWiesyGram

Caddie? What Caddie?
Two stroke penalty!? Why does Michelle Wie have to find out at the end of her round that she (get this) "moved a loose impediment" by touching moss in a bunker (rule 13-4c)? Where was Greg Johnston? Let me rephrase that. Where was Julie Inkster's former caddie? Is he only 16?



[Oh, well. Like the world's coming to an end, or something.............]

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Thu, 3 Aug 2006 10:43:13 CDTBlog

It's almost like somebody reads this thing...
The Israelis are now showing only steely-eyed Paul Newman visage in their war propaganda, although seldom do you see a squatting soldier with that shell-shocked, longview stare flicking coy glances at the camera lens. I'd have said John Wayne, but Marion "The Duke" Morrison was a Republic Pictures scene decorator who never heard a shot fired in anger in his life. At least Newman served with the political arm of the Irgun, if memory serves.

All Al Jazeera shows is bombed-out U.N. observation posts and dead kids in Qana. Man, that's so four days ago.

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Sun, 30 Jul 2006 22:41:02 CDTBlog

Naiveté
Looking at Israel's army on tv... Man, isn't it illegal to put soldiers that young and beardless on a battlefield? Is the tragedy here that Israel has only two or three old men or women who remember the last Israeli adventure in Lebanon, i.e., no cultural or institutional memory?

This is a point Robert McNamara learned in 1995, when he went to Vietnam to discuss the errors of the war with his Vietnamese counterparts, namely, that failing to appreciate the other side's viewpoint can have grave consequences in a world too nuclear as it stands.

I could be wrong, but what if Israel started addressing the grievances of Hezbollah, and Hezbollah started addressing the grievances of Israel ... one by one? Couldn't you postpone the question of whether Israel has a right to exist, and just sort of creep up on the question some sunny morning a thousand years from now? Wouldn't that Israel and that Hezbollah be long forgotten? War is not the answer. Maybe pretending to be pirates and playing nice is.

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Thu, 27 Jul 2006 17:33:56 CDTWiesyGram

Knock on wood...
I see two of my favorite golfers, Lorena Ochoa and Karrie Webb, are also tied for the lead at the Evian Masters in France...

[UPDATE: Michelle Wie won $255,333 for her second-place finish at the Evian Masters. She finished one stroke back from Karrie Webb, tied with Laura Davies at 15 under par.]
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Wed, 26 Jul 2006 23:00:48 CDTBlog

The War for Wikipedia: 2006 Israel-Lebanon Conflict
There appears to be another front in the Israeli assault on Lebanon, this one being waged in Wikipedia. Was the attack by an Israeli precision guided missile that killed four U.N. observers yesterday "unintentional" or "deliberate"? Today there was a mention that Human Rights Watch is investigating the incident as a possible "war crime." Will that language still be there tomorrow? Wikipedia disclaims responsibility for any "rapidly changing" content.

My personal opinion is that it's just textbook IDF doctrine, Moshe Dayan's old "mad dog" standard for Israeli defense. You'll recall he bombed the U.S.S. Liberty (1967 June 8), a deliberate act also followed by profuse official regrets and lamentations, just like today's. The old berserker rage seems to have been devalued by the first Israeli pullout from Lebanon, though — at least, Hezbollah seems to be striking its own insane emblem over the old Israeli coin.



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Tue, 25 Jul 2006 16:59:47 CDTBlog

A: Peking Duck?
Q: Who put the brain slug on George W. Bush?

(Forget about understanding this. You'd have to remember things like hegemony, "distant barbarians," and Kissinixonger on the Great Wall in 1972, and I wouldn't wish that on anyone...)

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Sun, 23 Jul 2006 22:06:06 CDTSOBS

Resurrection mist: Don't leave home without it!
Polished off Rival in all her various guises this morning, with a team consisting of Precis, Chisato and Celine. Poked around the Siren Ruins and a few of the early dungeons, now that Celine can teleport, but I think I'm done for awhile. I should add a few things to the glossary, I suppose....

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Sat, 22 Jul 2006 01:16:42 CDTBlog

Just dumb, I guess
I'm not sure what a "strategic ally" is, or why Israel is the United States' best one of those. Is there a U.S. Naval Base in Tel Aviv? Do we stockpile nuclear weapons in Negev? Does the U.S. Air Force carry on from Nazareth? Is Gitmo reopening in Herzliya Pituah?

Or... Strategic... Hmmmm... you mean, like oil? Do we import oil from Israel? If so, why aren't we buying it direct from Saudi Arabia, Iraq, Iran, Russia...? What DO we import from Israel in a strategic way, aside from Dreamworks and a few electronic components for the U.S. Air Force and NASA? It's stupid, being ignorant like this, but geopolitics was never my strong suit in college.

I've got to wonder about Israel, though. If my goal was to settle the entire world supply of everyone the same tribe as me in every corner of one place slightly smaller than New Jersey, I'd sure pick the exact center of all my traditional blood enemies. It's a bit like Custer at the Little Big Horn, in a way. Sure, Crazy Horse is outgunned. Hasn't got a chance, really.

Personally, if I had been Lord Balfour at that seemingly innocuous moment in English history (November 2, 1917), I'd have picked Switzerland for the new Zion. It's surrounded by mountains. You can bloody well defend Switzerland.

But that was then. These days, were I looking for U.S. strategic allies, I'd pick Mexico for obvious reasons (volunteer slave labor), followed by Canada, Japan, the E.U., and so on. Israel would be dead last on my list, kind of like a perennially suicidal kid sister. You might love her, despite the angst and aggravation, but you get tired of her late night dramatics and you know one desperate midnight she'll win her angry argument with herself.

Nope. In my book, Japan makes perfect sense as a strategic ally. For one thing, almost 99% of the world's coolest affordable toys, including Hondas, Sonys and Nikons, come from Japan. Japan is the world's toymaker. And the Japanese Archipelago makes kind of a neat staging area for U.S. invasions of North Korea, doesn't it?

Like Josef Stalin used to say, it's not what you pledge NOT to do that counts. It's what you CAN do when your Neocon administration blows a mental gasket. Interestingly, Lord "Bloody" Balfour created two world insurgencies in his long, masterful life — the entire current crop of Islamic jihadists ... and the Irish Republican Army.


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Thu, 20 Jul 2006 09:12:34 CDTBlog

Ann Coulter, no. Lili Estefan, si.
I was fixin' to slander Ann Coulter, but a quick glance through the snarkier reaches of the Web has convinced me the job is in capable hands.

Instead of that, here's a link to the real La Flaca, Lili Estefan.

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Sun, 16 Jul 2006 13:37:16 CDTWiesyGram

Cut, cut!
Jeff Gove, who found himself out of his league but playing in Michelle Wie's group anyway, at the John Deere Classic last Friday, seems to have been griping about Wie's "slow play" the day she took herself out of play with heat exhaustion. Gove took himself out by failing to make the cut. His remarks have not gone unnoticed:
"This is not some girl power thing, either. I fully believe in [Michelle's] equally inept playing partner on Friday, Jeff Gove, having the inalienable right to be marginal at PGA Tour events as well."
             — Jennifer Floyd Engel, The Mercury News

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Thu, 13 Jul 2006 09:54:40 CDTBeavis Schmeavis Dept.

Cedar Rapids Gazette drops Coulter
Ann Coulter was my favorite Slytherin, and at her best she could turn liberal shibboleths into ruin and desolation with a six-word tsunami of disdain. Her column was really uneven, though, and seemed to perk along on the first person pronoun and the ever-redolent stench of Chappaquiddick.

In short, she is what John Dean is calling a Conservative without Conscience, i.e., a member of the Karl Rove blackshirts who have captured and are now being lodged in the Goldwater right wing without due process.

I greatly admire rhetoric, even or especially savage rhetoric, so Coulter still has a place in my pantheon of evils. Next to Magda Goebbels. Unfortunately, her bombshell blonde appearance, while pleasing, seems to be matched by the acid frustration of a woman who has either been edited (or edited herself) out of the gene pool. I was hoping she would hook up with some Rear Admiral and quietly disappear into a cloud of private bliss.

Heh.


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Tue, 4 Jul 2006 14:34:56 CDTWiesyGram

2006 U.S. Women's Open results
Lynnette Brooky, born in Fort Dodge, Iowa, took the smallest paycheck given at the 2006 U.S. Women's Open, $7,107. Se Ri Pak, Stacy Prammanasudh and Michelle Wie hauled away $156,038 apiece. Wie has pulled just shy of $395,000 out of her driver sock since turning pro last October on her sixteenth birthday. Nice hobby.

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Mon, 3 Jul 2006 10:38:19 CDTWiesyGram

Varicose brained remarks
Only Johnny Miller could find Michelle Wie on his radar yesterday. Her echo is so huge, it's like watching the early stages of Hurricane Michelle aiming at the pine needles coast of North Carolina: "She's only 16, folks. This is uncharted territory."

Some of the other remarks at the U.S. Women's Open were as blithely varicose brained as that "packed like Sardinians in a tenement" crack by Bud Collins at Wimbledon a few decades ago. My favorite was the "slump for American women" that has, by default, allowed a regrettable Korean ascendency (Se Ri Pak, Birdie Kim, et al.) in women's golf of late. Uhhh... maroons? Michelle Wie is a member of the set of American women golfers. Her ascendency has the potential to last fifty years. Get used to it.

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Sun, 2 Jul 2006 13:35:46 CDTWiesyGram

U.S. Women's Open: Michelle Wie's scorecard
Michelle Wie's, of course... (^^;)

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Thu, 29 Jun 2006 07:26:30 CDTBlog

Grassley's modest proposal
I see Iowa’s senior U.S. Senator, Chuck Grassley, wants the IRS to confiscate the loose cash, diamond pinky rings and pimpmobiles from lowlife hoods who prey on desperate housewives by selling them into white slavery. (Gee, can you say, "body of existing law"? Or, "Mann Act"?)

Lord. Truly, law is the Devil’s plaything. Aside from this being the slippery slope to Sharia, the reenactment of Kansas Blue Laws and confiscating the cash registers and personal wallets of HyVee employees who sell beer to minors, I can’t figure out what’s got the wind up ol’ Chuck’s chimney so bad. He’s not up for re-election until 2010, so all’s I can figure is, he’s trying to blow sand in the eyes of Iowans who really, really think Bush has blown it Big Time on Iraq.

Hmmmmmm... Maybe I do see something. Grassley has never been known to criticize a government waste whistle-blower too harshly (if at all, waste seepage stanching is his stock in trade)... So my guess is, he’s sided with the New York Times, a pillar of the Republic since long before Bush’s granddaddy was a twinkie, so Chuck is trading a little behind-the-scenes hardball with Karl Rove for an up-front sin sop to the Christian wingnuts, most of whom aren’t even Iowans.

Sheesh. It’s just a theory. Like evolution?
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Sat, 24 Jun 2006 13:24:41 CDTWiesyGram

Sheehan speaks
I see Patty Sheehan, my other favorite golfer of all time, thinks 16-year-old Michelle Wie is doing just fine, thank you, so leave the kid alone. Her, and Arnold Palmer, and anyone else with a clear-eyed grok on the future... ;-)


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Tue, 20 Jun 2006 23:43:47 CDTSOBS

Hmmmm...
Blundered through the underground ruins in Notto, somehow. Got the Parentia Stone... (Why does that seem familiar? In the immortal words of Maynard G. Krebs, "You rang?" Nag, nag, nag... Really reminds me of something... :-)

All too easy... I belong to the overwhelming force school, evidently, and spent a lot of time levelling up in Leviabor Ruins.
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Sun, 18 Jun 2006 12:35:31 CDTCars

Spoiler
Weren't those tractors from Cars drawn in the style of Tex Avery, a man outstanding in his field?

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Sat, 17 Jun 2006 12:15:18 CDTSOBS, etc.

Things
...Things...
...Things...
  • The bridge at Nusa Wharf south of Scout Village can only be extended from the other side.

  • Chisato Madison is the one who likes the hot new brands of soccer ball.

  • Crane Ruins has a nice puzzle. How does one arrange 5 sliding boxes on 8 pressure switches? And why? (Or maybe I'm just stupid — it took me well over five minutes to figure this one out ;-)

  • Apparently, Ultimate Sphere exists because Japanese kids can’t read the squashed-gnat kanji on their GameBoy Color screens, either >:-b

  • I have to congratulate our President, George W. Bush, for creating the Northwestern Hawaiian Islands Marine National Monument at the stroke of a pen, the other day. It’s not as good as a time machine or a way out of Iraq, but it is outstanding, in the Teddy Roosevelt tradition.

  • I gave up on JapanesePod101.com because they've started charging money for a Gen X rich kid's giggle set. True, they know how to teach Nihongo... But there are other tools out there that may be more cost effective.

  • Dave Letterman’s desperately unending campaign to duck the polite applause at every rimshot and thrust through the nearly infrangible iconolatrous silence festering in the old Ed Sullivan Theater is enough to make you laugh. His latest ploy? He’s hired somebody’s brother-in-law to guffaw at appropriate moments. The joke was, Milton Berle useta stash his D.O.M.’s horselaff in the audience. Ha ha, can you say, Tillandsia usneoides?


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Thu, 15 Jun 2006 18:33:21 CDTSOBS

Nusa Beach
Nusa Beach is a bitch. There's no sand there, for one thing!

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Tue, 13 Jun 2006 21:32:41 CDTBoycott iPod

Where's the ILGWU in the People's Republic of Capitalism?
Shades of Triangle Shirtwaist Company... Another reason to hate the iPod!

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Sun, 11 Jun 2006 23:09:44 CDTSOBS

The veils are beginning to fall...!
My current favorite game, Star Ocean: Blue Sphere, is written in Japanese, but I've begun to insinuate myself into meanings :)

And what fun it is! It turns out that Noel and Chisato are your intelligence experts. Noel can cast a scan over monsters to discover their strengths and weaknesses, while Chisato, ace girl reporter that she is, can snap their photos. This information gets collated into The Big Book of Monsters, which is the second item in your list under Keys (far right, the key icon).

Those monster reports are a gold mine of information, because (among other things) they tell you what monsters might drop when you take them out. The Assassin Ant, e.g., which is rendered as a single pixel (!) on the Game Boy Color screen, lugs a gigantic gold piece around; and while the lowly Wato (a war robot made on the cheap, evidently) yields only scrap iron, some of its more heavily endowed brothers drop gold ingots and other goodies when they haul over and die.

Naturally, Japanese websites have precompiled all this stuff (in Japanese, of course ;-) I'd have to say, one of the best sites out there is Ultimate Sphere, a cut above the rest, mainly because it includes all the SOBS kanji. Reduces eyestrain! Thank you, Ultimate Sphere!

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Fri, 9 Jun 2006 23:54:33 CDTSOBS

Glossary
I've started working on a Japanese-English glossary for Blue Sphere...

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Thu, 8 Jun 2006 16:56:42 CDTThis Day in History

June 8, 1967
Moshe Dayan orders the Israeli air force to strafe the U.S.S. Liberty in international waters, 34 U.S. sailors killed.

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Wed, 7 Jun 2006 23:57:34 CDTLow down rotten blues

Village People
The musical group seems to have learned at the knees of the masters...

That's not bad, though. Japanese have to hire private detectives and do research to discriminate against 2% of their countrymen, who are otherwise indistinguishable by language, DNA or race from poor (but non-burakumin) Japanese. Almost enlightened, by U.S. standards.

We white Americans discriminate against 30% of our countrymen (all U.S. citizens) based on race. Us Caucasians are a shiftless, lazy lot who can't be bothered with mental or financial effort.

And that doesn't even include thousands of illegal immigrants who speak Spanish, a heckuva convenience for rednecks who may not be certain if some white folks are on the hate list.

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Tue, 6 Jun 2006 07:25:44 CDTBlog

Dear Diary
Three years ago today, I saw Natalie Maines get off the elevator at the Radisson Riverfront Hotel in St. Paul, MN. She wasn't wearing makeup, and my first thought was, "What is this? Natalie Maines Look-Alike Day?"

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Sun, 4 Jun 2006 14:10:24 CDTJapanese

Wiktionary?
Wiktionary has a section on Japanese language.

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Fri, 2 Jun 2006 07:38:04 CDTPolitics

Post-election Analysis
John Kerry lost the last presidential election because he licks his lips. Constantly. And delicately, the way a Marine would use an expletive. It made him look like a cat.

More curiouslier, something like this also explains why John McCain can't get his party's nomination for chief cat wrangler. It's his bland. McCain stays cool when the situation demands a screaming fit. Since everybody knows McCain is naturally sarcasticklier than a vat of sulfuric acid, nobody believes the Mr. Rogers act, and it's biting him in the ass.

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Thu, 1 Jun 2006 16:40:12 CDTRepublicans for Voldemort

Dad-gum Slytherins!

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Wed, 31 May 2006 00:26:42 CDTHaditha

The mental picture is bad enough
Tell me again, Georgie... What does an 8-year-old girl's brains slipping onto a U.S. Marine's boot have to do with spreading the shining benefits of democracy in Iraq? (Just don't show me the pictures.)

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Sat, 27 May 2006 12:09:22 CDTBlog

Another fig from ever fewer thistles [Updated]
The penny drops a million miles an second, but it seems to take forever. I can't believe how slowly I realize what some of the old stories might mean — talking principally about Jesus cursing the fig tree for lack of fruit. Ok, that seems disturbingly petulant, right?

This passage is usually explained away as a reference to "fruitless Israel," since it occurs in the vicinity of Jerusalem. But such a reading is not necessary. Jesus, called Rabbi, is familiar with the Torah. The story is not about figs, or trees, but about results — it's about Time and Timelessness, the Beginning and The End, Alpha and Omega; in other words, it's about Jesus, famously the fruit of the womb. The fig tree is a cautionary tale — no fruit, and there goes the whole damned tree, blasted root and branch by a vengeful deity of some sort.

But there's another tree in the Bible, isn't there? — the Tree of Life. The point of the story is not the Fig, but the Vine. The alternative, the unexpected twist. The other tree, the family tree, not the poor doomed fig tree but the Tree of Life — that yields first Mary, then Jesus — so it turns out to be a co-redemption parable in which Mary is the new Eve (the one who gets it right), in which ultimately all of Nature, and immediately all of humanity, is intimately, mutually co-implicated in its own redemption. (C. S. Lewis discusses the redemption of nature in Mere Christianity, IIRC.)

Co-implication? Mind blowing stuff for us Buddhists, let me tell you!

But you have to understand the story in the fourth dimension, in Time and Space. And that loses almost everyone (even your eyes are glazing over, I can tell!) Well, I hate amateur exegesis, too, so enough of that...


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Sat, 27 May 2006 10:28:54 CDTWhat's the magic word? Dept.

Hey, today is my unbirthday, too!
My Amazon.com wish list...

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Fri, 26 May 2006 14:24:25 CDTMOTD

Banana Crackers #473
Its failings notwithstanding, there is much to be said in favor of journalism in that by giving us the opinion of the uneducated, it keeps us in touch with the ignorance of the community.
             — Oscar Wilde
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Sun, 21 May 2006 09:12:30 CDTSOBS

Ring Ring...
Blue Sphere WEBRING
« BACK | RANDOM | LIST | NEXT »
Not a very large webring, actually — parts of it have eroded under the relentless indifference of web entropy — but it turns up fascinating stuff like this. Evidently, fans crib off each other just as voraciously in Japan as elsewhere ;-)

By the way...
What the Blue Soldier says near the entrance to the mysterious Ralf Dungeon:
“Aba City is across the bridge to the south, then due east.”

What the Red Guard says at the entrance to the mysterious Ralf Dungeon (SW of Garp Dungeon):
“You can’t come in here without a permit!”

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Sat, 13 May 2006 10:09:28 CDTSOBS

Got SOBS?
I found (and bought) this aforementioned (Jan. 4, below) Game Boy Color antique on eBay, waaay overpriced compared to the "15 new and used" items on the Amazon Japan list, but in satisfactory condition. Star Ocean: The Second Story (SO2) has turned out to be my favorite of the series, so far.

Star Ocean: Till the End of Time (SO3) has way too many toolmarks on it for my taste — paths to interesting areas are simply blocked, obvious visual cues such as ladders and roofs lead nowhere, and so on. Also, the characters in SO3 are blank and expressionless, like dolls, whereas the "primitive" animations in SO2 (and now in SOBS) actually suggest far more in the way of character development. And SOBS is the direct sequel to SO2 — meaning, in large part, that it has a sense of humor (ok, ok, you do have to read Japanese to get the jokes, but they're there...)

I do enjoy the original Star Ocean (SO1), and while I have the game, I don't have the SNES console, so I've had to play it in emulation. I've gotten far enough into the original to understand that the Time Gate on Styx (SO3) is what happens when you relinquish creative control of your storyline to another team. Ugh.

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Thu, 11 May 2006 22:20:53 CDTManifest Destiny

Are snail darters important?
Well, yes, but the average American cannot possibly imagine why. The short answer to the question "What's one minor vanished species, more or less?" is simply, "What's one finger in the dike, more or less?"

In other words, the focus should not be on the snail darter, but on the niche that created snail darters when the entire rest of the ecosystem gridlocked eons ago into a stable, post-Ice Age ecology. That empty hole is going to be filled, and Nature guarantees that human concerns will not be consulted by whatever novel hoobiyahs come next to darn the tears and stitch the tatters.

In other, other words, can you say, e.g., Ebola? Hanta? H5N1? Get the picture?

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Tue, 9 May 2006 13:49:03 CDTScientific Catholicism

Vatican astronomer: Can this guy last?
Boing Boing calls the Vatican Astronomer a hoopy frood, and I agree. But I wonder how long he can last in a fundamentalist world ready to make all the insanely wrong choices in the name of God's own revelation? Whatever, Brother Consolmagno has become the media's favorite Go To Guy for pithy quips designed to drive Christian fringe loonies straight up the wall, while garbed in a Jesuitical piety that the late John Paul II certainly relished. No word yet on what Benedict thinks.
“...He described creationism, whose supporters want it taught in schools alongside evolution, as a "kind of paganism" because it harked back to the days of "nature gods" who were responsible for natural events.

“[He] argued that the Christian God was a supernatural one, a belief that had led the clergy in the past to become involved in science to seek natural reasons for phenomena such as thunder and lightning, which had been previously attributed to vengeful gods. "Knowledge is dangerous, but so is ignorance. That's why science and religion need to talk to each other," he said....”

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Sun, 7 May 2006 01:34:53 CDTPR#1

Lisa 2.5 Documentation Files
Finally recalled how to print a file on an Apple ][+ ...

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Sat, 6 May 2006 13:18:01 CDTStar Ocean 3

What...?!
The last time I played Star Ocean 3, I never met Ruddle and Rumina until the closing denouments. Now they’re in Aquios, even though I ignored the sidequests. Peculiar.

[SKT Open: Michelle Wie's march into the history books was foreshortened a bit when the SKT Open in Incheon, Korea was rained out yesterday. The third round, interrupted yesterday by the downpour, becomes today's final round — making it a 54-hole tournament. Same number as on Wie's baseball uniform in the pre-tournament hoopla. An omen?]
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Fri, 5 May 2006 16:31:04 CDTWiesyGram

Wie makes the cut at SKT Open in Incheon, Korea!
What’s this? Wie can’t stand her caddie, either? (Elbow in the ribs, head tilted away, etc. Great body language. Guess whose contract is expiring slowly, slowly in the wind...)

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Thu, 4 May 2006 14:26:57 CDTWiesyGram

Make the cut?! How's about finishing fifth, or better?
Michelle Wie is 2-under and five back after Round 1 of the almost all men's SKT Open in Incheon, Korea. Watch out if she wins this. Wie will become the world's greatest female athlete since Brünhilde.

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Thu, 27 Apr 2006 22:08:12 CDTStar Ocean 3

Strange...
When Nel Zelpher saw Gemity for the first time, she said it made her eyes hurt. When I replayed that identical sequence for my daughter (who missed seeing it first time around), Nel didn't say boo. Also, we got the crap kicked out of us by the security forces at Flad's house. You can't step twice into the same Ganges, I guess.

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Sat, 22 Apr 2006 10:25:45 CDTLangwidge

ChinesePod.com
Another excellent expatriate podcaster...

Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.
      — Susan Ertz [another Unix fortune cookie]


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Fri, 21 Apr 2006 15:05:37 CDTBanana Cracker #313

Today's Unix fortune cookie
The common cormorant, or shag,
Lays eggs inside a paper bag;
The reason, you will see, no doubt,
Is to keep the lightning out.
But what these unobservant birds
Have failed to notice is that herds
Of bears may come with buns
And steal the bags to hold the crumbs.

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Wed, 19 Apr 2006 15:37:08 CDTBlog

i.P.O.S. [UPDATE BELOW]
My antique original-model scrollwheel iPod died today (my guess is, my very own P.O.S. original iPod battery finally scoobied). Figures. Apple seems to have a 5 or 6 year silent expiration date on nearly every piece of hardware it’s ever put out. If it hasn’t broken in 0.5 decade, it’s useless because state of the art has ungainly thrashed so far inland from the surf. I won’t miss it much, but it was fun while it lasted.

[UPDATE, 21 April 2006: After retrieving my iPod a la funk from the trash and wiping off the sauerkraut, I was able to reset the pup blind (with power off, apparently). Then, when I plugged it into my iBook, it came right up. But it's still a P.O.S.: I paid over $400 for the aggravation, three lousy weeks before the minimum iPod size jumped from 5 Mb to 10 Mb. Don't tell me, I already know: For “only” $59 more, Apple will replace my battery. Steal of a deal...]

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Mon, 17 Apr 2006 18:59:54 CDTLinux

Free Lunch ... er ... Linux from Ubuntu
I ordered a free Mac CD from Ubuntu on March 25, last month, and it arrived today. I must say, very impressive. Ubuntu is the first PowerPC Linux I’ve seen that actually recognizes my iBook’s touchpad well enough to be usable.

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Sun, 16 Apr 2006 12:06:01 CDTTR7

The legend continues
Forward + Jump + Crouch lets Lara swan dive. And who the whack is Amanda Evert?!

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Thu, 13 Apr 2006 17:52:13 CDTBlog

JapanesePod101.com, again
The podcasts from JapanesePod101.com have forced me to upgrade to iTunes 6. Podcasts, now! Wow. Automatic downloads...! In a month or two, I’ll regret this, I know. I’m just not sure how, yet.

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Sat, 8 Apr 2006 09:31:04 CDTNihongo

JapanesePod101.com
Although JapanesePod101.com can be cheerful enough to set your teeth on edge, it does offer something amazing — free, daily, university-quality Japanese language instruction in a podcast format. These lessons seem to be 10-15 minutes long, on average, and feature Japanese voice actors, both male and female, along with your gaijin guide and host, the omnipresently team-spirited Peter. He reminds me of the young Mickey Rooney in one of those oldschool Judy Garland vehicles. The Japanese voice actresses seem to be caught up in the spirit of things, while simultaneously eyeing the expiration dates on their contracts. One of them, Noriko, speaks perfect English with a nearly-perfect Midwestern accent (she lived 12 years in Toronto, Canada.) It would be interesting to know how well she has re-assimilated into the Tokyo collective. My guess would be, extremely.

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Sun, 2 Apr 2006 12:36:13 CDTBlog

Fever...
Maybe it’s flu... Whatever, my head swims. Dreamt I saw the Angel Moroni, which seems odd. Standing behind a wavering sheet of clear flame, or maybe it was hot water. There was a Revelation...
MORONI: He’s not on television, David. He’s on the radio.

Y.T.: Yeah? So what’s your point, Moroni?

MORONI: If you’re going to take the trouble to lampoon somebody, you could do it right.

Y.T.: I did it right. Radio’s not funny.

MORONI: What do you mean, radio’s not funny? Ever listen to Jack Benny?

Y.T.: My point exactly. Ever listen to Rush Limbaugh?

MORONI: Well, to tell the truth, we’re kind of into cellular, these days.

Y.T.: What, everyone?

MORONI: Well, Lucifer’s really into Sirius Satellite...
Like a dream, he faded away....

Fantastic! Three of my favorite golfers [viz.: Wie, Ochoa, Webb] in the top three at the Kraft Nabisco Championship, and Michelle Wie takes home $108,222 with her this evening. If Wie ever figures out how Natalie Gulbis played Chrissie Evert's girl power games with her head all afternoon ("just look at this thumbnail"), she'll have to share a bit less of the loot next time.

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Sat, 1 Apr 2006 14:22:06 CSTGo

Guan Yu
There is on IGS an extraordinary painting by Utagawa Kuniyoshi entitled General Kuan Yu Plays Go, which shows Kuan Yu enduring surgery while apparently using a game of Go as an anaesthetic.

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Sat, 1 Apr 2006 07:51:33 CSTWiesyGram

Wie is 4 back at the Kraft Nabisco after two rounds
I see the world’s best golfer is still having fun at the Kraft Nabisco Championship...

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Wed, 29 Mar 2006 07:29:37 CSTiPod

iPod settlement check
My $25 Apple iPod Settlement check came yesterday. ’Bout time, too.
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Tue, 28 Mar 2006 23:09:43 CSTWiesyGram

Rush Limbaugh dies and goes to ... ah ...
Rush Limbaugh dies of a heart attack while playing golf, so he manfully shoulders his own golf bag and trudges toward what he presumes is the Pearly Gates, far off in the distance. As he gets closer, he realizes that it’s not the Pearly Gates at all, but Pebble Beach. He can see players on the course, and is somewhat shocked to realize that every one of them is nude, male and female alike, except for shoes, gloves and caps. Well, it must be Heaven, thinks Rush, but he can’t find any way into the clubhouse. Somehow, Rush gets turned around and winds up in front of the caddyshack, where a long line of tired, old white guys are standing around, looking bored. Suddenly, the caddy master, a four foot tall red devil with a tail, pitchfork and horns (and not a stitch of clothing) yells, “Rush Limbaugh!” Yo, thinks Rush, and runs to the head of the line. Somehow, he’s lost his own bag of clubs. In fact, he’s a bit startled to realize he, also, is completely naked. The devil hands Rush a number, and points to a cart path toward the first hole. “You’re caddying for Michelle Wie. Haul your lazy butt to the first tee, and be quick about it.” Wow, thinks Rush, this IS heaven, after all, although he wonders about the weight of the bag he’s suddenly carrying. As Rush approaches the teebox, he meets the starter, who is a tremendous shock. The starter is a grossly fat blue demon with a member the size and color of a ripe eggplant. “Limbugger,” he yells, “you’re ten minutes late! Stand over there, shut your yap, and don’t speak unless the best golfer in the world deigns to notice you and ask your execrable offensiveness a question.” But no matter where Rush stands, the starter yells at him in increasingly profane and obscene terms, until finally he notices a Golf Channel monitor. “Get on that, and shut up,” yells the blue devil, finally mollified. Michelle Wie, dressed like an angel in impeccably pure white, walks by, notices Limbaugh trying to balance on the television monitor, and says, “Who are you?” You guessed it. There is a sudden BANG and a puff of orange smoke, and Rush Limbaugh turns into a red russet Idaho. “I,” he says, “am a common ’tater on tv.”

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Sun, 26 Mar 2006 23:21:25 CSTStar Ocean 2

Ambivalence
After you wipe out Indalecio, the game ends...

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Fri, 24 Mar 2006 17:13:53 CSTBlog

Schlock and Awful
Ok, we all lined up to drool on ourselves when Rumsfeld was single-handedly winning the war in Iraq, so it’s our own damn faults for not noticing, but — remember Shock & Awe?

No such thing, was it? Hiroshima was shock and awe. Nagasaki was shock and awe. Bikini Atoll (the one they underestimated) was shock and awe. The Viet Cong’s contempt for “bombing Hanoi back to the Stone Age” was shock and awe (Right? Consider that the Vietnamese version of our Vietnam Veterans Memorial, if it existed, would be eight times larger, with a smaller font — proving they were eight times more willing to win.)

Dribbling a few sudden bright spots on downtown Baghdad was, pardon my French, incredibly lowjack. The fact was, Rumsfeld tried to win the war on the cheap, with zoot suit lingo filling in for boots on the ground.

Be honest. Wasn’t your private reaction at the time, “That’s it?


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Thu, 23 Mar 2006 17:05:47 CSTCST

Hmm, a clock
This is a Flash gadget found at JOL...

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Wed, 22 Mar 2006 13:25:46 CSTYou-nironic?

On hearing William Carlos Williams mentioned in a unironic breath
There are no gaps in Error —
Unreason makes a Whole —

No God uttered Adam,
no perfect Noun,
But pummelled Man with thumbs
of Imprecision — nails of Doubt —
from the violent Mud.

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Tue, 21 Mar 2006 00:04:39 CSTStar Ocean 2

End games...
The Cave of Trials is only marginally less obnoxious than Indalecio... Ugh.
[Update - got the Bunny Shoes!]

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Sun, 19 Mar 2006 12:48:30 CSTInteresting Times

Cultural fracture zones
Islam has two fracture zones, one with the West and one with the East, not counting minor internal schisms — an unenviable strategic position. Interestingly, all three cultural hegemonies seem to be mutually exclusive, but East and West are less alien to each other than either is to Islam. Japan is the fusion zone between East and West, if it lasts, but the New Orient's center of gravity is, of course, post-socialist China. The old Maoist "paper tiger" idea that American superpower is a myth is already being tested in the crucibles of economy. Fun times we live in.

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Sat, 18 Mar 2006 09:49:26 CSTJ-Pop

Will iTunes ever catch the jetcoaster?
Precis crashlands... Heads spin... The JETCOASTER comes to a stop... Hmm. Ok, with a little digging around the net, guess what? There’s a whole other culture out there, kiddies, up on the bleeding edge. You don’t just translate edgy words into Merkinese, you gotta tease your way into the context. The funny thing is, I thought J-Pop was only about a decade ahead of us...


[Hint: Think Jetcoaster Romance, the song iTunes can't catch up to — although, come to think of it, Apple doesn't really see iTunes as a gadget, but more like a global supply chain management system. The iTunes music store is kinda like WalMart, that way.]

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Thu, 16 Mar 2006 16:46:57 CSTStar Ocean 2

Technique 3
It was clever of those tri-Ace programmers to hide Technique 3 in plain sight in one of the first places you look after inserting Disc 2, long before you ever realize what you’ll need it for...! Heh.

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Wed, 15 Mar 2006 23:53:43 CSTStar Ocean 2

Decus... Vesper... aaaaaaggghh...
No... no... not... again... !

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Sun, 12 Mar 2006 01:06:37 CSTStar Ocean 2

Rummmbbble...
The standard black Sony PS2 controller has some pretty finely attuned rumble controls — everything from nuclear bomb to high-frequency electric arc gapping. I wasn’t expecting that.

(Star Ocean: The Second Story delivers once again, far into the second disk.)
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Sun, 5 Mar 2006 08:28:15 CSTWiesyGram

"Esse est percipe" - Bishop Berkeley
E.g., the official Michelle Wie web site is still showing a black screen and an official "Check back soon" message. So that means...?

Grikdog maunders: Speaking of controversy, I’d love to know what Muslims think about “scientific creationism.” Is Darwin a bit of an issue in Islam, or does the principle of ilm (which seems to be cognate with illumination) preclude intellectual dishonesty? [Actually, I regret having used the word "dishonesty," because it turns out that Islam does not admit that Adam evolved in any particular whatsoever, but was created by Allah. Fine. Adam was created by Allah. I, however, was descended from an ape capable of sovereign mental clarity and rational thought.]

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Wed, 1 Mar 2006 23:24:47 CSTWiesyGrams, Star Ocean 3, etc.

Things, Things, Things...
  • Yes, I noticed that Michelle Wie (203) came in alone in third place ($73,227.00) at the LPGA Fields Open last Sunday, behind Meena Lee (202, won the playoff) and Seon Hwa Lee (202). Morgan Pressel, tied for 11th with Paula Creamer and six others (208), took home $16,808.00.

  • I can’t get interested in the Maze of Tribulations. There’s just no reason to go there, aside from curiosity. And beating Luther again just to watch the wrong ending...? We wanted Nel Zelpher in our party all along. Enough’s enough.

  • Star Ocean 2 is really, really obsolete, but fun. The controls are more like the early Final Fantasy games, so it took awhile to realize I can save anywhere outside of towns. Paid $84 bucks for this pup, from a third-party dealer found at Amazon.com.

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Tue, 28 Feb 2006 07:33:34 CSTStar Ocean 3

Clear
Met the pink bunny by Luther’s staircase Sunday night. On to the encores...

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Sat, 25 Feb 2006 08:43:12 CSTClown Alley

Doh!
The same bunch of clowns that turned FEMA over to Michael Brown are the ones who thunk up turning U.S. ports over to Dubai, where, to paraphrase Westworld, nothing can possibly go worng. That’s why it’s such a bad idea.



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Mon, 20 Feb 2006 12:23:02 CSTStar Ocean 3

Lost in Firewall
After arriving back on Elicoor via the Sphere Company, I was pleasantly surprised to discover the game is still non-linear, and there’s still a way to get back to Gemity for life savers. This is fun again.

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Thu, 16 Feb 2006 08:40:12 CSTIconospasm

The Buddhas of Bamiyan would avert their eyes
The opportunities for voices of calm and reason to speak in the current clash of values over a few half-baked doodles intended to depict the Prophet Mohammed tick by unanswered every moment, so I thought I'd pour a little wet blanket on the fire.

Grow up, dummies. Really. Just as blowing up the giant buddha statues in the Bamiyan valley of Afghanistan was deeply offensive to Buddhists and most educated Westerners and Muslims alike, so deliberately linking the name of the Prophet Mohammed to turd-quality artwork in a minor right-wing rag in Denmark is deeply offensive to Muslims and most educated Buddhists and enlightened Westerners alike.

Even the famous Mogul miniaturists of northern India refused to depict the actual face of the Prophet, leaving a gold-leaf blank. And frankly, to get technical about it, modern fundamentalist Christians forget their own past iconoclastic spasms with appalling alacrity — not to mention conveniently forgetting about Commandment One, which Muslims still honor. Even Leonardo da Vinci never drew the face of Christ. The iconoclastic tradition in the West runs deep, and deeper still in the non-Western world. But extreme theories and unimaginable controversies are spawned in the clash of worldviews, like earthquakes spawn where tectonic plates collide. Say more than Jesus intended, say more than the Prophet revealed, and you run the risk of obloquy.

If the Taliban had left faces on those stones in Bamiyan, the buddhas would blush for Denmark. (And us. I see a few student newspaper editors in the U.S. have chosen to explore some ill-advised personal sophomorics, and my favorite Slytherin, Ann Coulter, also thoughtfully provides a link to the defecand.)

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Sun, 12 Feb 2006 10:07:52 CSTStar Ocean

MAJOR SPOILER ALERT!
Jeez, and I thought Malacandra was cool. It turns out, our sadsack uppity universe is RECURSIVE, and woodencha knowit? My sympathies are entirely with the annoying AI bugs.
(You gotta love those fanboy soliloquys in Gemity.)

The original, and Blue Sphere, from a couple of years ago are some other fine examples...

The bitmap font in this bootleg Japanese-language emulation is nearly illegible, but the game is more or less playable at this screen size (316 x 284) under KiGB. The blue legend in the corner says B:Jump. Note that Blue Sphere (2001) has a kawaii factor exceeding +50, which breaks a record held for years by Nintendo's A Link to the Past (1991). That game pinned out at +48 on the oldstyle Suzuki Zenko Cute-O-Meters, well into the laughably abbreviated neon pink zone.

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Sat, 11 Feb 2006 01:57:22 CSTStar Ocean 3

Moonbase
If there’s a profound life lesson in Star Ocean 3 (Disc 2), perhaps it lies in the unexpected way you beat the second Proclaimer. This game will live forever.

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Wed, 8 Feb 2006 16:52:26 CSTStar Ocean

Levelling Up
What a metaphor for the vast boring stretches of life! Even tedium has it’s place. Studying? “Levelling up!” Working late? “Levelling up!” Arguing with your boss, your wife, your family? “Levelling up!” And if life is a game, the consummate satisfaction of Game Over — one way or another.

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Tue, 7 Feb 2006 13:12:05 CSTStar Ocean

Hard Button Tap
Sounds like a bar Cliff would open in Airyglyph, doesn’t it? Why did I have to look this stuff up? Next time through, I’ll play it on Easy mode — the constant battles are pretty infuriatingly dull. Either that or level up to 25 before leaving Whipple.
- Light button tap (Happy tune)
- Light button hold (Playful tune)
- Hard button tap (Sad tune)
- Hard button hold (Angry tune)
        

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Sun, 5 Feb 2006 09:10:09 CSTKonami Kodex

/.rs r ntz
/. has gone insane.

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Sat, 4 Feb 2006 20:15:11 CSTWiesyGram

Official
I see the official Michelle Wie website has made it to placeholder status.
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Sat, 4 Feb 2006 00:03:22 CSTWizard of Karres

Verdict
The Daal and the Circus, and then the Sprite... nice work. The ending, telegraphed way too soon, isn’t even anticlimactic, and along the way we miss the Winter Ball entirely. The last six or seven pages are just an outline of the final third of a good book. Glimpses that vanish as we approach them. Lost opportunities.

I suppose it was nice to see a couple of good tales make it out of their respective drawers and into the light of day. A fast read with a couple of twists Schmitz might have wished he’d written, but frankly I’d much rather have read the novella (the Daal’s pursuit of Hulik do Eldel) and the short story — but Hantis’ ritual screaming match, as obviously conceived, was not what we got in this book. All that was left of a brilliant flash of insight into an alien culture was a frogmarch through a pointless and unsupported trial.

The Leewit’s name is neatly explained; sure, it begs the question, but as Tollsdottir family history, it makes sense. Maybe even enough to credit the seance. But we’re all still waiting for Goth to grow up or Pausert to get wise— just not this time. There are two stars buried in this book. Two out of five.

I suppose we have to give Lackey credit for the cunning allusion to (*) — sly, and not too obvious, it almost seems unintentional. Schmitz wouldn’t have understood, though, not even with Zone Agent Pagadan, the High Queen of Lar-Sancaya staring back at him from his own mirror.
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Fri, 3 Feb 2006 14:17:40 CSTWzOK

Hmmm...
I see how the trick was done. Three authors, three parts — beginning, middle, end. The beginning is flat, uninspired and derivative. The middle could be edited down to a fine novella, rather a good one, which would not be inconsistent with the way Schmitz wrote his original. Then, the ending — which I’m barely into — is stylistically different from its sisters, but oddly like Schmitz in his better moments. This might be a good book. Dunno. Still reading.
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Thu, 2 Feb 2006 13:28:46 CSTMinor Warlocks of Karres Dept.

Nova guns locked, Big Dream Thing!
Through page 128, this episodic thrilla has turned out to be a simple accomplishment plot wherein Captain Pausert, Goth, the Leewit, Hulik do Eldel, Vezzarn, Pul the Grikdog and Hantis the Nartheby Sprite leave Green Galaine aboard the Venture, meet a baby vatch, have their progess unaccountably impeded, and join the circus — with all battles and encounters punctated by predictably reliable but theoretically just as entropic as everything else Nova guns locked onto somebody’s crestfallen and humiliated uppitiness. The catalog of familiar plot devices so far includes
  • a diminutive though cheerfully “unmanageable” vatch,
  • an ALL-CAPS vatch, snatched to shreds and humiliated by Pausert,
  • the aforementioned Nova guns, whose only function in the book so far is as a kind of rhetorical punctuation,
  • assorted bad guys, including the Agandar’s old gang and squabbling factions including the Imperial Navy and IIS spooks,
  • Pausert thinking about Illyla, wincing,
  • Pausert thinking about Goth, blushing,
  • Goth thinking about Pausert, designing,
  • James H. Schmitz thinking about striking Mercedes Lackey dead for giggling about Goth and Pausert up her sleeve,
  • too many characters aboard the Evening Bird, especially those with names beginning with the letter H, cause mass confusion and the introduction of irrelevant plot devices,
  • especially Goth and the Leewit almost get killed off in Act 1, but are saved by the awesomely convenient klatha witch powers of Pausert, who feels inadequate,
  • and Sedmon of the Six Lives, whom you won’t believe it either.
But now the circus is in town. Maybe the seance will finally get interesting...?

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Tue, 31 Jan 2006 18:58:06 CSTWitches of Karres

...wtf?!...
James H. Schmitz was a minor science fiction writer of last century’s Sixties who had one book of utterly mad genius to his credit — for all the wrong reasons. Genius it truly was, as Hayao Miyazaki’s cover for the Japanese edition surely testifies, but Schmitz was the Freudian critic’s exemplar of all that is deeply, disturbingly weird about the creative process in second-rate hacks who can’t control their stream of Dionysian unconsciousness.

As soon as Schmitz tumbled to the snickering in the wings, he clamped down hard on those surging creative juices — and never wrote another book as good (whatever you think of Telzey Amberdon, she is never, ever out of control.) A pity, too, because The Witches of Karres (Chilton Press, 1966) has been crying for its unborn sequel for forty years.

Somewhat unexpectedly, since it came out in 2004, this book is it. I’ll let you know what I think later, but for first impressions? Well, lessee now... baby vatch, right where we left off... uncontrollable... Well, shot that wad in four pages, huh?
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Sun, 29 Jan 2006 08:37:44 CSTStar Ocean 3

More about "Le coin de Star Ocean 3"
This corner of the web contains a nice Star Ocean shrine, with excellent hand-drawn maps and discussion. You do speak French?

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Fri, 27 Jan 2006 23:15:05 CSTStar Ocean 3

Farleen and Tynave
I’m starting to feel downright pitiful sorry for Farleen and Tynave, Nel Zelpher’s underlings and the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern of their genre. Apparently, they set some people’s teeth on edge, especially the English voice acting (which I turned off on general principles long ago). Like everything else about Star Ocean, they’re probably not your cup of tea, but they strike me like a pair of six-toed kittens, always in trouble — and just a slash beyond your average spear carriers. There’s a manga in which they have better roles, apparently.

[R&G: That’s Tom Stoppard’s version, not Bill’s! The one they start out dead in.]
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Wed, 25 Jan 2006 13:05:34 CSTSee Peterny And Die Dept.

Another millenial proverb
Link’s Least Law of Level Largesse:
Look in all the chests.

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Fri, 20 Jan 2006 00:38:22 CSTTCM's January Miyazakifest

Whisper of the Heart (due March 7, 2006)
Hollywood does that ending right (sunrise suggesting a mood, rather than spelling it out) — so Lasseter was right to paper it over with lavish praise. A weak moment, those last 15 seconds, in a darn good slice-of-life animated manga.

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Wed, 18 Jan 2006 23:05:39 CSTPS2

Notes from the Wasteland
The best thing on television at our house is Star Ocean: Till the End of Time. Truth. I was seduced into Square Enix’s stuff by Final Fantasy I for Game Boy Advance, arguably one of the wittiest small adventure/RPGs ever written. Star Ocean has all of the wit and humor, and after the inevitable levelling up tedium down on the beginner’s levels, the best gameplay, story, characters, graphics and cut scenes I’ve seen yet. I’m very impressed.


For a real adventure click here.
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Mon, 16 Jan 2006 12:29:11 CSTDigital Velocity Dept.

Wow! 11.13 seconds!
Rubik’s Cube falls again! Congratulations to Leyan Lo of CalTech for solving the standard cube (not shown) in 11.13 seconds, a new world record. (Incidentally, the speed cubing web site is a good place to pick up sensible tips on how human beings solve the cube.)

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Sun, 15 Jan 2006 10:47:08 CSTOk, so it ain't godless communism anymore Dept.

Red Flag Linux?!
No more Tux, bring on the Shmoos!

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Fri, 13 Jan 2006 23:41:06 CSTWiesyGram

Can you shoot 68 in the second round at the Sony Open?
I’m a fan of Michelle Wie because when she finally writes her own how-to-play-golf book in about forty years, you just know she’ll never, ever, under any circumstances, use the word pronate.


[Nice to see she’s finally got her caddy on a short leash. Johnston hands her the driver when she asks for it, now. About time. All caddies are clowns.]
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Wed, 11 Jan 2006 07:34:37 CSTAnnoying Personal Quirks Dept.

The Thing I Hate Most About Samuel Alito
He’s a free-swiveling bobblehead.
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Tue, 10 Jan 2006 22:21:03 CDTAnime

Gadzooks! Studio Ghibli Fest on TCM in January!
Turner Classic Movies will air nine Studio Ghibli films in January 2006.









The films will air each Thursday between 7:00 pm and midnight (CST), in their original aspect ratios, commercial free.
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Tue, 10 Jan 2006 17:37:25 CSTWizards of ID

Monsters from the ID
“Id, id, id, id, id! It's an obsolete term, I’m afraid, once used to describe the elementary basis of the subconscious mind ... Even the Krell must have evolved from that beginning!” — Morbius, Forbidden Planet

Hush, Morbius. Top scientists now know how bees fly. Even better than ID.

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Sun, 8 Jan 2006 00:30:50 CSTNarnia than what?

Inklings Anonymous
Forgot to mention, we went to see Narnia I on Christmas Day. Good old C. S. Lewis. Disney’s version of his book is like a Fabergé egg — much SFX glitter crammed into limited headroom. I thought the movie was downright claustrophobic, in fact. The business with Tumnus the Faun, near the beginning, was fun. It shewed rather well a satyr-like rendition of the kidnapping of Lucy, or as much of it as the former Eisnerville dramaturges could bear to suggest — as I recall, Lewis’ version was way more evil, and so of course more effective, proving yet again that the devil has all the best tunes. Nothing else in the entire movie was that good. One could just about hear the ghost of J. R. R. Tolkien groaning quietly in a corner about godawful allegory — and C. S. Lewis gnashing his teeth about Disney’s rip-and-read transcript of a much loved text.

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Wed, 4 Jan 2006 21:55:00 CSTRPGee

Star Ocean: Blue Sphere
Does anyone know if this Game Boy Color antique is available in English?

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Sun, 1 Jan 2006 16:50:54 CSTBanana Crackers

Unix Fortune Cookie of the Day, Today
A little dog goes into a saloon in the Wild West, and beckons to the bartender. "Hey, bartender, gimme a whiskey."

The bartender ignores him.

"Hey bartender, gimme a whiskey!"

Still ignored.

"HEY BARMAN!! GIMME A WHISKEY!!"

The bartender takes out his six-shooter and shoots the dog in the leg, and the dog runs out the saloon, howling in pain.

Three years later, the wee dog appears again, wearing boots, jeans, chaps, a Stetson, gun belt, and guns. He ambles slowly into the saloon, goes up to the bar, leans over it, and says to the bartender, "I'm here t'git the man that shot muh paw."
        — fortune

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Sat, 12 Nov 2005 18:00:48 CSTUnreal Estates Dept.

Details culled from the C.I.A. World Factbook
A few sizes, in square kilometers

Russia17,075,200
Antarctica14,000,000
United States9,631,418
China9,596,960
Brazil8,511,965
Australia7,686,850
India3,287,590
Kazakhstan2,717,300
Tibet (China autonomous region)2,470,000
Greenland2,166,086
Mexico1,972,550
Saudia Arabia1,960,582
Indonesia1,919,440
Alaska1,717,854
Iran1,648,000
South Africa1,219,912
Egypt1,001,450
Turkey780,580
Texas695,622
France547,030
Sweden449,964
Iraq437,072
California423,971
Montana380,837
Japan377,835
Germany357,021
Vietnam329,560
Norway324,220
Italy301,230
Colorado269,602
New Zealand268,680
United Kingdom244,820
Oman212,460
Syria185,180
Washington182,949
Tunisia163,610
Georgia153,910
Iowa145,754
Nepal140,800
Greece131,940
Ohio116,096
Cuba110,860
Iceland103,000
Jordan92,300
Maine91,647
United Arab Emirates82,880
Panama78,200
Ireland70,280
Georgia69,700
Denmark43,094
Netherlands41,526
Switzerland41,290
Taiwan35,980
Albania28,748
New Jersey22,587
El Salvador21,040
Israel20,770
Hawaii16,179
The Bahamas13,940
Falkland Islands12,173
Lebanon10,400
Puerto Rico9,104
Delaware6,446
West Bank (Palestine)5,860
Washington, D.C.4,773
French Polynesia4,167
Rhode Island4,002
Gaza Strip (Palestine)360
Virgin Islands352
Liechtenstein160
Monacoless than 2

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Sat, 12 Nov 2005 09:48:10 CSTHeaven and Hell

Pat Robertson to burn in hell for 12 nanoseconds
After the awesome thermonuclear love scrubs his soul clean of mouth, brains and charisma, maybe he’ll be ready to start evolving again. Go Directly To Slime, Pat. Do Not Pass Go. Do Not Collect $200.

All kidding aside, the part I love about this little globe whirler is that all eight of the “Intelligent Design” school board goons who were up for re-election were kicked back to church and out of office by the intelligent voters of Dover, Pennsylvania. The entire slate! Bravo, Dovah!


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Fri, 11 Nov 2005 21:08:49 CSTC3PE

Wit and Wisdom
“It takes an entire village to build a hamburger...”

[Grikdog regrets...] Sorry, can’t say who said this or what it’s about. It all started on Monday, November 7, though.
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Mon, 7 Nov 2005 18:35:53 CSTEvolution

Evolution in the bible, says Vatican
[NEWS.com.au - Martin Penner] THE Vatican has issued a stout defence of Charles Darwin, voicing strong criticism of Christian fundamentalists who reject his theory of evolution and interpret the biblical account of creation literally...

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Sat, 5 Nov 2005 23:32:22 CSTChess

Napoleon vs. The Turk
Why did Napoleon lose this game? Was he bamboozled by The Turk’s inhuman puissance?  Was he lulled into a false sense of confidence by his own prowess as a military engineer? Or was the emotionless “automaton” simply absolved from the subtlest danger of sycophancy, i.e., how to throw victory the tyrant’s way? When Napoleon lost, the story goes, he swept the pieces from the board, yelled “Bagatelle!” and stormed from the room — fair evidence he underestimated The Turk and overestimated himself.

Rather more than most famous men, Napoleon seems to have had a narrative sense of Self concerning which he willingly suspended disbelief. He was in other words a chump, as Harry S Truman (who never took a bribe, and never lost at poker) was a chump. I can easily imagine Madame de Remusat wagering with herself whether she might endeavour to swoon twice against The Little Corporal’s famous “knight attack,” once as White (Paris, 1802) and once as Black (Malmaison Castle, 1804).

[Event "?"]
[Site "Schoenbrunn"]
[Date "1809"]
[Round "?"]
[White "Napoleon"]
[Black "The Turk"]
[Result "0-1"]
[ECO "C20"]

1. e4 e5 2. Qf3 Nc6 3. Bc4 Nf6 4. Ne2 Bc5 5. a3 d6 6. O-O Bg4 7. Qd3 Nh5 8. h3 Bxe2 9. Qxe2 Nf4 10. Qe1 Nd4 11. Bb3 Nxh3+ 12. Kh2 Qh4 13. g3 Nf3+ 14. Kg2 Nxe1+ 15. Rxe1 Qg4 16. d3 Bxf2 17. Rh1 Qxg3+ 18. Kf1 Bd4 19. Ke2 Qg2+ 20. Kd1 Qxh1+ 21. Kd2 Qg2+ 22. Ke1 Ng1 23. Nc3 Bxc3+ 24. bxc3 Qe2# 0-1

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Thu, 3 Nov 2005 12:47:47 CSTGolf

Q. Are players allowed to use measuring devices, such as a laser rangefinder on a golf course? -- David C. Oshel
Whaddaya know? Local rules will apply starting in 2006! The Honolulu Advertiser says I asked that question, this morning. I didn’t actually ask, per se — as I recall, I ranted on about how laser rangefinders should be legal — but it seems my assumption was wrong ;-)

In any case, even if this modern stuff is forbidden to players in a tournament, it’s a heckuva lot more fair for Rules Committees to use a laser rangerfinder than the so-called ball of “plumber’s string” that got poor Michelle Wie disqualified!

The article points out that GPS-based measuring systems could also be used, and would probably be easier and more accurate for the average Rules Committee to deal with. GPS could eliminate doubts about the previous day’s pin placements, too.

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Thu, 3 Nov 2005 08:10:12 CSTIvory Towers Dept.

Why I'm not a journalist
Ok, back in 1968 I joined the student chapter of the inkstained fraternity, Sigma Delta Chi, at Iowa State University, but that doesn’t make me a journalist. That was under duress. I was stoned. There was peer pressure, for godssake! No, the real reason I bailed out of Storyland is the AP Style Book, a collection of petty rules so simultaneously arbitrary, puissant (pronounced “pissant”) and jejune as to make a dried prune look plump.

According to an article about AP Style Book idiocy in this morning’s Honolulu Star-Bulletin, Hawaiians are no longer Hawaiians, they are “Hawaii residents,” unless you happen to be a member of the ethnic minority of “native Hawaiians” — in which case, the formerly collective noun may now be used in its restricted, local and inevitably pejorative sense as a synonym for the pidgin missionary word “blackfella.”

Way duh go, morons. There are no Iowans in Iowa, by that logic. They’re all “good” Indians.
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Tue, 1 Nov 2005 12:06:43 CSTHarkinistas

Remembrance of Dings Passed
Every once in a while I like to remind myself of my Harkinista roots, even though these days I’d call myself an independent (I’d vote for a John McCainChristine Todd Whitman ticket, e.g.) But those naive salad days were fun...
The 1977 Harkinistas
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Sun, 30 Oct 2005 20:52:14 CSTWiesyGram

Michelle Wie PGA Tour '06 (Nintendo GameCube)
Way to go, Wiesy! If, as you say, half a million bucks seems like such a paltry sum compared to all the hurricane damage, why not donate a percentage of your residuals on the upcoming Michelle Wie PGA Tour '06 GameCube game? I’d buy that. Maybe game designers could include a mini-game where you yell “Fore!” as your banana hook beans The Hamburglar lurking in the bushes, “Five!” as you bonk Jean van de Velde on the next fairway over, and so on. Think of it as product placement.

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Fri, 28 Oct 2005 09:13:07 CDTAnime

Tokyo Godfathers (2003, Sony Pictures)
I found this by accident the other day. Very odd anime, it picks pathos from a bottomless ragbag of homeless cliches. Well plotted Christmas miracle story with a couple of surprises — especially when you’ve come to respect the coincidences. It’s the story of a teenage runaway and her two down-and-out protectors (a drunk and a jaded refugee from Cabaret) in the slums of Tokyo. They find a newborn in the trash on Christmas Day, followed by pain and delivery to their own redemption.

Despite gorgeous craft, what I can’t quite decide is whether this is a kind of Runyonesque costume play for smartypants Nipponese film-makers, or whether there really are ethnic Filipino slums in Tokyo. Like some of those early Kurosawa gangsta fillums, Tokyo Godfathers doesn’t quite clink like da McCoy.

Oh, well. Watch it at a soup kitchen near you.

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Fri, 28 Oct 2005 00:27:42 CDTHawai'ian Mythology

Pele, Hawai'ian Goddess of Volcanoes
[A-Muse-ing Grace Gallery] ...Pele is said to appear in many forms — as a beautiful young woman, an athlete who competes against mortal chieftains, or a fiery-eyed old woman dressed in white. In this form, She has even acquired somewhat of an urban legend: the tale goes that drivers on the road that cuts through Kilauea National Park will sometimes come upon an old lady all in white. She bums a ride and a cigarette, but later, when the driver turns to speak to her, she has vanished...

[Grikdog muses along...] Just thought I’d mention, in passing, that Michelle Wie is playing golf with former President Bill Clinton on Sunday, October 30, according to USA Today. Italics mine, of course... (^^;)
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Tue, 25 Oct 2005 18:29:32 CDTAnd Going And Going...!

Sympathy for the Bamburglar... Not!
The Wie DQ seems like it will never fade away, leaving more bruises on Michael “The Bamburglar” Bamberger than on Michelle, and rightly so. Incidently, according to Curtis Murayama, Sports Editor at the Honolulu Advertiser, the ball–swallowing Gold Lantana bush was 40 yards from the 7th hole cup. So Wie's drop, confidently made in the inexplicable absence of roving LPGA officials, was a miniscule 0.2083 percent of the total distance in error. In other words, she eyeballed her drop within 99.7917 percent of the correct distance, without benefit of illegal props like "plumber's string" or laser rangefinders!

Links:
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Mon, 24 Oct 2005 15:55:17 CDTFly Trap?

The I Ching online
Reasonable translation...
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Sun, 23 Oct 2005 10:17:25 CDTMy Favorite Slytherins Dept.

Who is Michael Bamberger?!
Bamberger is the guy who got Michelle Wie disqualified this evening [Sunday, October 16, 2005], no doubt as a public service to the Royal & Ancient keepers of da Roolz. Also of note, Sports Illustrated ran an article called "Unplayable Lies" by this guy in their September 24, 2001 issue. Perhaps he can also explain the history and time-honored tradition of the famous Buttinsky Rule in golf, the one that says any smeghead who knows how to get inside the club ropes can complain to High Mucky Mucks about minor infractions with major repercussions. What is this, Caddyshack?


Some books & articles by Bamberger
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Fri, 14 Oct 2005 12:01:04 CDTBlog

LPGA continuing education uses Rosetta Stone
Hey, cool! One of the most uniquely intelligent language instruction programs around, Rosetta Stone, is part of the LPGA continuing ed program, according to an interview last Wednesday (at the Samsung World Championship, Palm Desert, California) with Carolyn Bivens, the LPGA commissioner.

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Thu, 13 Oct 2005 11:04:42 CDTHow Obvious Does It Have To Be Dept.

Bird-like dinosaur forces rethink
[BBS News] ... Buitreraptor gonzalezorum, from the Nequén Basin in central Argentina may provide tantalising evidence that powered flight evolved twice....

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Sun, 9 Oct 2005 00:22:36 CDTThings That Last Dept.

HP-11C (1981-1989)
I've only had to replace the batteries in my HP-11C three or four times, tops, since I bought it back in '85 or '86. This time, I bought 3 Energizer 357 Silver Oxides (1.55 V), which replace the old SR44's, although I think I've had AG13's in there, too.

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Thu, 6 Oct 2005 21:11:20 CDTDept. of Slow Grinds Dept.

Eisnerville's Brain Truss Slips A Rivet
Whaddaya know, Eisnerville's boneheaded decisions (like, e.g., Cinderella III) can no longer be blamed on their former poster boy for suppurating brain drain. Evidently he resigned. Odds they tap Steve Jobs for CEO, anyone?
 About this big.
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Sun, 2 Oct 2005 08:45:12 CDTBlog

Stealthed!
I loved Bork's ... er ... Roberts' little speech in which he conceded that, yes, apparently, he now is a separate but co-equal branch of government.

What's with all those Democratic airheads on the Senate judiciary committee who tried to trick this guy out on law and precedent? They should have asked him about his READING LIST and explored the vacuity of his horizons! Hasn't Bork ... I mean, Roberts ... ever read Douglas R. Hofstadter's Gödel, Escher, Bach and doesn't he realize that no system of thought can be both axiomatic and self-consistent?

Roberts is the kind of smartass legal weasel who will follow any twisted chain of punk syllogisms to any perverted conclusion that suits his sense of (pardon me while I retch) "judgment, not politics" — a humorous twist of bitter irony that plumbs the irrelevance of Gödel's Theorem.

Nothing succeeds like the long knives logic of the über Right.
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Sat, 1 Oct 2005 16:56:19 CDTDDD Dept.

Red Blue Alice

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Sat, 1 Oct 2005 10:26:34 CDTThick Little Book Dept.

CRC Handbook of Chemistry and Physics
Welcome to a wealth of data online with the latest CRC Handbook of Chemistry and Physics....

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Sat, 24 Sep 2005 09:18:07 CDTEasy Come, Easy Go Dept.

Israel orders 'harsh response' to Palestinian attacks
GAZA CITY (AFP) - Israeli Defence Minister Shaul Mofaz ordered a harsh response to Palestinian rocket attacks as troops pounded Gaza with air strikes, all but dashing hopes for a new era of Middle East peace....

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Thu, 22 Sep 2005 20:03:04 CDTBlog

When Doody Calls
Just a suggestion...

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Tue, 20 Sep 2005 20:23:53 CDTDid God Write Moby Dick??!

Princess Di in Moby Dick!
The code for "Lady Diana" is unique in the entire book...!

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Mon, 19 Sep 2005 00:13:33 CDTR!

September 19th is Talk Like A Pirate Day
RrrrRRrrrrrRRRRRrr, me hearties! An’ wot bucket o’ scum & villainy be ye abrewin’ fer Talk Like A Pirate Day?

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Sat, 17 Sep 2005 15:34:06 CDTZenstinct

Huike Offering His Arm to Bodhidharma, by Sesshu
I’ve never agreed with Alan Watts’ telling of this incident. The true dialog probably went like this:

Bodhidharma ...???
Huike Sesshu drew this scene kosher, I notice [i.e., no blood]...
Bodhidharma Offering ham to a Buddhist monk? Have you lost my mind?
Huike I’m beside myself...

Silence...

Bodhidharma I suppose you think you have a right to bear arms?
Huike I was trimming a hangnail...
Bodhidharma A close shave, then. And just about as mindless?
Second Patriarch Ha! Never even blinked!


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Thu, 15 Sep 2005 17:12:13 CDTNews

Think doomed
Yeah, yeah, Laughing Squid is going on about WordPress (i.e., blogging) at the Billboard Liberation Front, but "Think doomed" is what cracked me up...

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Sat, 10 Sep 2005 14:23:34 CDTSnowball's Chance Dept.

Arafat says natural gas field great hope for Palestinian economy (September 27, 2000) -- Violence erupts after Sharon visits Jerusalem holy site (September 28, 2000) -- Natural gas of Gaza to profit Palestinians (August 27, 2005)
(CNN.com 9/27/2000) ABOARD THE JANDELAY (AP) -- From the bridge of a fishing vessel, Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat observed the bustle of activity Wednesday on a huge British Gas drilling platform, then bellowed into a walkie-talkie...

(CNN.com 9/28/2000) JERUSALEM -- Israeli soldiers fired tear gas and rubber bullets at rock-throwing Palestinian demonstrators on Thursday after an Israeli opposition politician's visit to a disputed holy site set off a violent confrontation...

(Washington Times 8/27/2005) Major natural gas fields off the coast of the Gaza Strip may prove a vital lifeline for a beleaguered Palestinian economy that has few other resources to exploit...

[Grikdog Barks at the Fig Tree] I mention this because the fact that these huge offshore natural gas reserves have survived Israel's scorched earth withdrawal from illegal settlements in Gaza seems cause for wonder, if not celebration. Of course the "withdrawal" is frankly conditional — I estimate Gaza will be reoccupied by Christmas, latest, especially now that George W. Bush is distracted by domestic issues. His thumb on Ariel Sharon's carotid artery is the only reason any settlements have been dismantled.
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